A Scarred Soul

I was listening to an excerpt of Dr. Martin Luther King’s speeches where he was talking about Jesus’ directive for us to “love our enemies and turn our cheeks…”. He reasoned that Jesus knew these actions would be difficult to implement, but that it would be better to have “scarred bodies” than “scarred souls”.

As singles, we often encounter negative situations that tempt us to react in negative ways. You broke my heart, then I will stop loving you. You spread false rumors about me, so I will not be nice to you. You played me like a piano, so I will do what I can to get revenge. Each time we repay meanness with meanness, we introduce another scar to our souls.

I know it is hard to love others as God commands us, but that’s the key command that Christians should live up to. We Christian singles need to remember that we get out marching orders from God, the very definition of love, not satan who is the opposite of everything that God stands for. So when we treat others as badly as they treated us, we are switching allegiances to the other side!

Eventually, a scarred soul will lose all of its spiritual vitality. Then it will become difficult to pray on a regular basis, get up to go to church or to bible study, love others as God commands us to, affirm each others’ humanity as wonderful creations of God and forgive (and forget) when we would rather lay our religion down.

At people’s worst is the time when people need our best. Be honest, it is easy to love someone who loves you or be nice to someone who is nice to you. But spiritual infants can do that! Jesus laid down a challenge for us to grow and mature in our ability to love as God loves us. He might as well have said, “Wimps, need not apply.” If He understood then that we may have to endure some scars on our bodies to preserve the health of our souls, then why would He expect anything less of us today?

Lord, I’ll Trust You

Okay Lord, I admit it. You are a lot smarter than I. I’m not complaining, but you did have a bit of a head start. I mean, you’ve been around since the before the beginning of time so you were bound to learn a thing or two. I know, you were “smart” before time came into existence, but my point is, you’ve been around long enough to build up some frequent travel miles, if you know what I mean. But of course you know what I mean; you are God!

Can you clue me on something? It seems like this singleness thing has me a bit confused. When you observed that is was not good for Adam to be alone, were you just referring to him or to all of mankind? Or maybe your statement only applied to some people, but not all. You see, I am alone and I am beginning to feel like that is the way it is always going to be. Not that I’m questioning your wisdom or anything, I just want some answers. That is, if you don’t mind.

Because you are so smart and all, I will trust you. Can’t say I will always agree with you, but I will do my best to go along with your program. Surely, in the gazillion plus years you have been around, you have encountered all kinds of people in all kinds of situations. So my current state of singleness must not be something new to you. But it is new to me. Got any answers? Something that can put my mind to rest?

Is there someone out there for me that will be just as excited about being with me as I will be about being with her? You see, up to now, my timing has been off. But I am sure you have better things to do than to hear about my lack of a love life. So instead of complaining, I will just try to trust you. See, I’m starting get a little smart myself! I may not know everything, but I know enough to rely on you.

Not that I am telling you what to do, but could you kind of hurry up with the solutions to my problems? Unlike you, I don’t have a gazillion plus years. I mean, a brother would like to enjoy that someone special in this lifetime, if you know what I mean. But of course you do; you are God! That is why Lord, I’ll trust you.

What Do You Mean When You Say I Am Not Good Enough?

Okay, this is something new for this blog. Periodically, I will write a short scenario and I want you to write a brief (no more than two sentences) response or reaction. I think it will be interesting to see how different people view the various scenarios that will be presented.

“I can’t believe you have done this. You call me and invite me to this fancy restaurant. You let me order what I want and then you have the nerve to say that to me? You say you are feeling stressed about our relationship and that it is time we take some time away from each other. Are you breaking up with me? Is there something I have done or said to make you not want to be with me anymore? And one last thing, what do you mean I am not good enough?”

What I meant by that statement was _________________________________________.

The New Definition of Being Gay

Not too long ago, I made a shocking discovery. I found out I was gay!! You think you were surprised, well then you can imagine how surprised I was. This revelation was all the more shocking because I have never had sex with a man and never desired to have sex with a man and never fantasized about having sex with a man. Just between me and you, when I do have my fantasies, it includes me and a woman. (Nia Long, if I have to name names). So you must be wondering how I discovered I was gay. Let me see if I can explain.

The other day I was speaking with someone that I had not seen in awhile. We did the usual catching up stuff. “Where have you been?” “What have you been up to?” Things were going pretty well until the girlfriend question came up. (He’s married, so I didn’t think to ask about his girlfriend.) Anyway, when I told him that I do not have a girlfriend and there are no prospects, he shared with me that others had speculated to him that I was gay.

Let me see if I got this straight. I am gay because I don’t have a girlfriend and I am not having sex with a lot of women and I don’t walk around sniffing after women. Does that pretty much sum it up?

So that is how I found I am gay.

Excuse me as I climb on my soapbox. (Cue the music please.) Okay people, we have to do better in our relationships. Let’s stop assuming the worse about each other. Let’s stop putting people in these crazy boxes we construct with our own fears and issues. Let’s stop tearing each other down. Let’s start being sincere in our efforts to build up each other. And for goodness sakes, let’s stop making people gay just because they don’t flaunt their love life (or in my case, my lack of one.)

I still can’t figure out when this gay change took place. I have been so focused on moving forward in my life and getting the bills paid, that I completely missed that moment when I came out of the closet. Or am I still in the closet? Is it okay for me to come out or do I have to wait to be outed? Gee, this gay thing is complicated. I think I will go back to just being a heterosexual, just like God created me.