Stop In The Name Of Love

Every now and then, people will question by what authority we do what we do. For single Christians, the answer should be "LOVE".

Love is the only thing I know of that is all positive. There are no drawbacks to love. However, there are ways we can misuse it, but love in and of itself is all good.

If we acted under the authority of LOVE, we would experience healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

• Family members would get along better
• Platonic friends would develop deeper, more stable friendships
• Romantic partners would experience long-lasting blissful love
• Co-workers would exist in a better work environment

But, we must remember that LOVE does not happen by accident. It requires conscious and dedicated effort and committment. It also means the elevation of the needs of others over our needs. Furthermore, it means placing a higher priority on the building of healthy relationships than on the servicing of our egos and the feeding of our fears. Love is always about somebody or something other than me. (It is always outward flowing, never inward.)

So today, let's live by the spirit behind the phrase "STOP IN THE NAME OF LOVE"

The Worst Thing God Can Say To Me

Perhaps it is a testament to my growing relationship with God that I can admit to certain moments of discomfort with some of our interactions. I do not think it is blasphemous to say that there are times when I don't like what God has to say to me.

But as I reflect on who He is and how so unlike Him I am, I can put my "complaints" about the words from God in the proper perspective. God being who He is, shows understanding of my wariness at times and patiently lets me get things off my chest. I believe that since I usually go along with His program and agenda even when I have my reservations, He tolerates my moments of weaknesses. If I were to couple my complaints with disobedience, then I believe He would be less forgiving about my questions.

For me, the worse thing God can tell me is to WAIT. I can handle pretty much everything else, but waiting is a challenge. For you, patience may not be the worst thing God can say, but I suspect there is something you would rather Him not say to you.

As you deal with your "dreaded words from God" and as I deal with mine, let's not forget that usually on the other side of those words is a blessing. Not just for us, but for others we interact with. The more I think about the worst thing God can say to me, I increasingly realize that they are not so bad after all.

The More Important Thing

In our relationships, we often elevate our own views and habits at the expense of others'. We have developed a comfort level of how things "work" and we assume that those we relate to will see it that way too.

• "I may not say it, but you will know I care for you through my actions."
• "I may not show it, but you will know I care for you because I say it."
• "If you are nice to me, then I will be nice to you."
• "If it comes down to choosing between my pride or my relationships with you, I will always choose my pride."
• "Because it makes me vulnerable, I will not tell you how much I care for you. That is something you should just know."
• "If how I feel for you changes, I will not tell you, but you can tell from my actions."

Let's look at God's example. He did not choose His pride over a relationship with us. He not only TELLS us He loves us; He SHOWS it as well. He was willing to come outside of His comfort zone to prove His love for us.

In our relationships, romantic, platonic or otherwise, let's not discard them. Rather, let's do all that we can (and more) to nurture them. Whether we want to admit it or not, it's not about our pride or fears. Moreover, it is not about always being right or our partners always being wrong. None of that stuff really matters. Our relationships are the more important thing.

Guilty of Misquoting God?

Far too often, we have assumed the Bible takes a particular stance on various issues. Homosexuality is a good example of this. Is the Bible really all that clear on whether or not homosexuality is morally wrong?

Many of us have strong opinions when it comes to that issue and I suppose that is our right. But let's make sure we are clear on what the Bible says and that we don't proclaim what we WANT the Bible to say.

On any issue, follow these steps to develop a clear understanding of the Bible's stance:

• Identify the particular scriptures of relevance. (How many times have we said something like, "I don't know where it is in the Bible exactly, but I KNOW it's in there"?)
• Develop a true understanding of what the author of those scriptures was saying. We will often be surprised to find out that what we thought was the main point actually is not.
• Try to understand the context of the scripture as well. Often, we wrongly interpret scripture because we really do not understand the context.
• Acknowledge your biases but try to do your best to set them aside in search for the actual truth in the scripture.
• Even when you are convinced the Bible condemns certain behaviors, always remember that all of us need grace and mercy moreso than we need justice.

The last thing we want to do is distort our spiritual understanding of issues by blatantly misquoting God.

It's Not That Serious!

I am a big football fan. I look forward to Sunday afternoons when I can enjoy a full day of professional football and a plate full of pancakes. That is a "tradition" that I have been following for over 20 years.

Does this mean that I am not available as a friend on Sunday afternoons? Certainly not! While I treasure being able to watch a good grid iron contest (or sometimes it is the television that ends up watching me), I care for you enough as my friend to be there for you when you need me. Even if it is during one of my prized lazy Sunday football afternoons. I am a definitely a fan, but it is not that serious!

It is my prayer that we all will be willing to "sacrifice" some of our much anticipated pleasures to talk with and/or help out others. Football is just a game, but whatever challenges you may be facing on Sunday afternoon, now that is some serious stuff!

My Birthday - Isn't That SPECIAL?

Yesterday, November 3rd was my birthday. So what? Big Deal!

My birthday was special to me, but for most people, November 3rd is just another day. Is there a spiritual lesson we can discover from this? Of course!

God made each of us and that fact alone makes us special. But, as we go about this business of living, we must make a point to elevate the "specialness" of other people. Why? Because God loves us and He does nothing to diminish who we are. Even at the risk of being hurt by our spiritual callousness, God CHOSE to love us. If God is willing to put Himself at risk by loving us, then we should be willing to take on the same risks by loving each other. There are many aspects of Godly love, but the main one for today is the notion of loving others without diminishing them. Often, we have "loved" people with the real motivation behind our so-called love being getting something from them or fulfilling our need for power or dominance or manipulation.

Thinking about my birthday helps me to remember that other people have special days and we all are special in our own God-given ways. Thus, our journey of singleness should focus on affirming the "specialness" of others, since that is what God has done for each of us.

In short, we should treat everyone as if that day is their birthday as a way of recognizing the special qualities God has placed in them.

Halloween Prayers

Halloween is a day that many Christians do not honor nor celebrate. But, as I was thinking about that day, I was moved to make mention of two segments of our society that often goes unnoticed.

SINGLE MOMS - Halloween is a time in which they serve as tailors, drivers, candy bag stuffers, trick or treat greeters, "Mommy, I'm sick from eating all this candy" healers, creative artists while also performing their normal duties as cook, washer, disciplinarian, etc. Let's remember all of the single moms out there everyday, not just on Halloween.

"Lord, remember all of the single moms out there who are carrying the burden of single parenthood without the support (emotional, physical and financial) of their childrens' fathers. Bless them and enable them to keep their head to the sky."

WANNABE MOMS - There are some single women who would love to become mothers. For whatever reason, motherhood has eluded them. Many of them have not given up hope, but they cannot help but wonder if becoming a mother is in the cards for them.

"Lord, bless all of the single women out there who long to become mothers and allow them to grow in their understanding of what your will is for them."