Not Just A Rusty Old Pot!

Every day presents growth and learning opportunities. Given that fact, it is shameful that we are not smarter nor wiser than what we are. I wonder if God looks at us and just shakes His head because we don’t know what we should know and we often act like we don’t know what we do know. Often, we look at Catholic priests or wily politicians or professional athletes or even our romantic partners and we say, “You should know better!” Well, let’s stop condemning them and take a good look in the mirror because there are some things we do that we should know better than to do. What a shame, a crying shame!

I just finished talking with my oldest brother and he was telling me about a beat up old blue pot our family used to carry in the car as we were traveling. Why in the world did we carry that rusty old pot? The short version of this family history lesson is that as African-Americans, there were places we could not go and facilities we were not allowed to use. What this meant was we had to bring our own food to eat during the trip because we could not stop at many of the restaurants we saw on the roads we traveled. Because we could not stop to use the restrooms, we carried this pot as our version of a portable potty. I, being the next to youngest of my siblings, do not remember the pot or the reasons for its existence for our family, but that does not mean it did not exist. The same is true of our respective histories.

As Christian singles, there are many lessons to learn concerning that “dingy old pot”.

• We all have a history and it influences us in ways in which we are not always aware. However, what we don’t know about ourselves, it is imperative we learn. If we ask ourselves questions like, “Why do I like to do certain things in certain ways?” or “Why is this subject so important to me?” or “Why do I get so angry when certain things happen?” we can start down the road to learning more about our past and how it makes us tick.
• Because each of us have a history, we must learn each other’s history if we are going to relate to each other in healthy ways. There used to be a time that our parents would forbid us from hanging out with members of certain families because of their reputations and histories. Well, there are some people with whom we should not interact because of the incompatibilities of their histories with ours. Conversely, there are some folks we should readily hang out with because of the potentially positive impact they can have on us.
• God has the capacity and the willingness to help us to use our respective histories to enhance us and strengthen our relationships. Because He knows us and He knows those with whom we intermingle, He alone is qualified to direct us to those people who will be good for us and to divert us away from those people who can harm us. This is the gift of discernment.

My prayer for Christian singles everywhere is that we will learn all that we can about the “rusty old pots” in our respective lives. As we discover our nuggets of history, I pray that our increased self-knowledge will help us to be better friends, romantic partners, co-workers and family members. It is my hope that we will grow to appreciate the valuable lessons to be learned from the “dented old pots” from our past.