Anyway, sometimes in a false sense of piety, Christian singles try to deny what is obvious to themselves. If you won’t admit to it, then I will. Frequently, I will observe a woman I think is quite sexy. It could be her physicality or it might be due to some intangible quality. Does my recognition of a woman’s sexiness make me less of a Christian? Well, I hope not!!
As I mentioned in my previous post entitled, “Look at, Not For”, the problems with seeing the beauty that God has made in the form of other people have more to do with how we process that information. Upon seeing a sexy woman, do I indulge myself with sexual fantasies? Anytime we reduce someone to the role of just being a sexual tool for our pleasure; we deny them their humanity which is the very opposite of what single Christians should be doing.
The other day, a woman paid me a compliment about my looks and it was something I needed to hear at that time. How often do we miss out on opportunities to uplift people with compliments because we think it may be inappropriate? Just as we should be discreet in the compliments we give, we also need to be mindful of how we react to being complimented. For example, when the aforementioned woman complimented me, I didn’t try to turn that into a game of sexual hide and seek. I thanked her and smiled and we moved on to other things to talk about.
So, if you think someone is sexy or attractive or has very alluring features; I see nothing wrong with letting that person know. If necessary, you can “warn” them that your compliment is not a line or an opening move to get in their pants or steal their hearts. You are just acknowledging another one of God’s beautiful creations. Additionally, if you are the one being complimented, don’t immediately try to turn it into a romantic or sexual relationship. If that is meant to be, it will come in time.
I am convinced that God wants us to enjoy our singleness for as long as we are single. If being a Christian single mean denying that there are sexy and attractive people out there, then that would take away from some of the enjoyment of being single!! Just because I think someone is sexy doesn’t mean that I want to sleep with them or make them my girlfriend. Healthy relationships should be based on more than just that.
Now as the summer season approaches, let’s get out there and have some good Christian fun and see how many sexy people we can take notice of in our respective journeys of singleness.
3 comments:
Mr. Writer,
I am sure you will not agree but I am okay with that.
God has not called us to tell people they are sexy but to lead them to salvation by telling them about the love of our lives. Telling someone they are sexy leads to lack, the lack of relationship and seeing our singleness as lack instead of opportunity to serve God whole-heartedly. To tell someone they are sexy simply feeds the flesh and tends to create lack and dissatisfaction. Therefore I am not sure I agree that being sexy and being a Christian even go together.
Speaking from experience before truly repositioning my thoughts and position in Christ I made the mistake of telling a male I found his lips sexy and he had nice eyes but I told him this is not what drew me toward him it was his love for the Lord. It was so easy for him to believe he had sexy lips and nice eyes but it was the part I found most attractive about him he had problems believing. Therefore our relationship turned sour because he started to pursuit me for my flesh because of the one little word “sexy”.
I realize not every one is going to act this way or take the compliment about sexy in this way and certainly you seem to be handle this compliment but I have to ask the same question you ask me once, what does our sexiness have to do with your spirituality.
I am so glad God allows us to be able to live in this world and have individual thoughts and opinions but I think it is certainly important to line up with the word and not the world as a Christian. If God does not convict you for the same thing He convicts me for “it is not God”…I trust God therefore, he will bring to my mind and heart his thoughts and his words…oops sorry but sexy is not one of those words. I think we should put God first in everything we do and in every thought.
Sign,
L.A.T.D
I thank God that I am not of the mindset to ignore the beauty that He has planted all around us. I am also thankful that I am not boxed in by my piety that I cannot appreciate sexiness when it makes its appearance.
I don't recall asking you the question of what does sexiness and spirituality have to do with each other, but did we come up with an answer?
To me, being spiritual is being uplifting. It may be inappropriate to use the exact word "sexy" at times, but I do believe it is spiritual to compliment one's physical attributes as well as their spiritual traits.
I do think all of us need to separate "sexiness" from "relationship". So that if you say that word to someone or someone says it to you, we don't automatically try to throw together a relationship.
But hey, if you'd rather go around not appreciating all the beautiful people out there, fine by me. But, with summer approaching, I am going to see how many sexy people I can notice. Don't worry, I promise to do so in a spiritual way! (smile)
The person that left this comment has asked that it not be published. However, I have chosen to publish it anyway because it continues the dialog that I feel is important to this blog. To me, it is not necessary for you to agree with me. Instead, I think it is more important to have and express your own thoughts on the various posts.
I thank this person for his or her opinions and value the intensity with which they express their thoughts. This person's comment is below:
But we are able to simple agree to disagree on this article. For you are the writer I am only one reader...
For you again are way off and once again very judgmental!
I am most thankful to God as well that I am in a mindset to behold God’s beauty that He has planted all around us and even more thankful I am not full of assumptions that everyone who does not look upon the things I do as beauty or as you would state “appreciate sexiness” are somehow box up in their own piety…I thank to God I simply look at it as perhaps they are at a different place in their Christian Singleness, perhaps they give little thought to this “sexiness” thing because they see no way to enhance or grow in their walk with Jesus by telling someone how sexy they are. Even better they do not see beauty and sexy to be one of the same but very different.
Label me as you please this article has no substance in my eyes Mr. Writer but for you it certainly seems to have value in your “Journey of singleness” and having fun as a Christian. Hopefully, you do not wear your feelings on your sleeve because you are sure to encounter a few people that will not find this to be a compliment at all and mainly because “you don’t know them” there is no type of relationship of any kind, they may have a bit of a problem relating to this sexiness as you call it.
Perhaps you will find God is always in control and He should always direct our step; He is no respect of person and expects the same thing of you, as He does of me it does not change because perhaps you have been given a gift to minister to single Christians…
I thirst to learn from others and respect others and I realize that I don’t have all the answers; and certainly I am having an extremely hard time with this “single thing period” so I actually had to rethink this one and came up empty once again. Just think of it this way this may be something that has been given to you but as for me I have been convicted and invited to search the bible and my heart and realize Jesus did not go around inviting anyone into sexiness.
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