Trying to come up with answers to the question of why we are single can be uncomfortable. It is normal to wonder if there is something wrong with ourselves even as we also try to determine if something is wrong with others. Who is to blame? And as a fallback position, we can always blame God. But what’s the use of trying to convict God of a crime that He did not commit? You think God is guilty of making you single? Oh, really?
So exactly how do you explain this “God made me do it” defense? He created you with the desire to love and be loved; yet He blocks your every attempt at finding true love. Sounds kind of crazy when you really think about it. God as an “Indian giver” when it comes to teasing you with the hope of having a soul mate in your life only to snatch that dream away leaving you still single, still lonely and still dissatisfied. Is that what you think? Oh really?
Maybe you think God is not a dream stealer, but perhaps He has another purpose instead of marriage for you. Is this wishful thinking that in such a confused state where your singleness raises more questions than you can answer, that God can turn your question marks into periods? Deep inside in the quietness of your moments of solitary confinement, you sense this accusation of God as the stingy keeper of the answers to your singleness related inquiries does not make sense. Our Heavenly Father as the giver of a test of multiple questions, but with one answer that ends with us still being single. Is that what you label as purposeful singleness? Oh really?
Why in the world are you single? When you feel like no one is looking, you point the finger of accusation at God. He did it and you are willing to serve as the key witness at His trial. Exhibit A is your history of failed relationships, memories of broken hearts and soggy pillows soaked with your tears. You refuse to see that you are the real culprit. No, it is more convenient to place the blame on God. You declare that you are single because God is nothing but a “hater” and He does not want to see you happy. You vow that justice will be served and that the world will know that you are not at fault. It’s God fault you insist and nothing will get you to change your view. You are convinced that God will not have an alibi for the crime of forcing you into singleness. You have Him right where you want Him, don’t you? Oh really!
Tomorrow Post: “Why Are You Single? - Did I Do That?”
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2 comments:
Mr. Writer,
I am not really certain why I am still single, but I never blame my singleness on God. All that is good is of God; He is true to is word. Therefore we reap what we sow and sow what we reap.
Funny how being single can take over and take on conversations of so many curious on-lookers. Although they were not asked, many men feel the need to tell me why women my age are still single. I was just told today my chances of being married just plunged by 80% after I reached a certain age. Also, I was urged to think of dating and marrying someone outside of my race since many Black men are on the down-low, in prison or dead. To make matters worse, most men prefer much younger women. So these are the reasons why I am still single?
Everyone was not meant to be married. We dwell on being "single", not having that special person in our lives. There are a lot of special people in this world and if we are doing God's will, that will may not include marriage.
Just because we think we want to be in relationships to lead to marriage, that may not be His plan. So if we get off this trip and focus on what He wants us to do maybe we can see the whole picture and get busy concentrating on the real deal. His Work.
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