Last Week In Review 11/17/07

This week, the theme was A Woman With God In Her Eyes. I won’t summarize each post here, but a few closing comments and then I will respond to comments that were left by you. First of all, this series started with me reflecting on my lack of romantic prospects. But I don’t want you to miss the larger point of my writings. Whether or not I have a girlfriend is not a big deal. My life is what it is. But what is important is that we look at our situations with spiritual eyes. So as you think about what I have written, don’t focus too much on my love life. Rather, focus on how you can grow spiritually in your life. Second, in my interactions with women in all kinds of relationships; I have encountered very few women with God in their eyes. Funny thing about life is that two people can look at the same thing and draw two different conclusions. So these women may view themselves as having God in their eyes while I don’t see it that way. In the final analysis it is not important what I think of them, it is important how they (the women) view themselves in light of their spiritual understanding. A far majority of the women I have encountered in my life display some of the same things I referred to as NOT being God in their eyes. I see so much fear, ego, pain, hurt and even lust (not necessarily of me, but that’s okay I guess!! [smile]). As I hope they do for me, I pray for many of them and that God will guide them to where (not to who) He wants them to be, often without their knowledge that I am praying for them. I encourage all of us to pray for each other that God’s expectations will be realized, not our own selfish hustles.

Below are some comments I have responded to.

“I hope you are picky; wait until God saids [says] yes and you see that woman with God In Her Eyes and God In Her Heart. Only through the eyes of God will she appreciate and celebrate you the way you deserve.” What is it that you hope for yourself? I am not sure if I would put a label of “picky” or “not picky” on what I pray for others. Instead of hoping for pickiness, I would pray that people get so in tuned with God that they can recognize a person with God in their eyes. I would venture to say that most of us wouldn’t recognize a person with God in their eyes if they were staring us in the face!!

“It is my thoughts you are playing unfair. I am not sure about anyone else but I truly wanted to know Kevin...and this was without any exceptions [expectations?].” Why are you wanting to know me? Wouldn’t your time be better spent on focusing on your spiritual growth? That’s why I write this blog. Not for people to know me. I am not what is important. God is. Let’s keep our focus on Him.

“Kevin, please take the mask off and stop pushing people away...If I ask if you can get this book or that book yes I need that book but at the same time I am just trying to find an entry point of friendship. BUT I am like God in this way that I truly have your best interest at heart and will not force myself on you.” I do not understand what you mean by “take the mask off and stop pushing people away”. But I think the problem may be that you are focusing on me. I am not what’s important. God is. Always remember the purpose of this blog is to foster spiritual growth. Getting to know me or searching for an entry point of friendship is not what this blog is about. When I write, it is not just my thoughts, but my understanding of what the Holy Spirit is telling me. That is not to say that I cannot be friends with my readers. But I want us to keep the main the thing the main thing which is God and His will for our lives.

“Well, I don't think I want to go around expecting to meet Mr. Right any day. I try to live each day enjoying all that is laid before me. Yes there are lonely times but life goes on.” Not just waiting for our soul mate, but also expecting God’s favor to rain down on us TODAY. Today, it may be a new job and tomorrow it may be an unexpected phone call from a long lost friend and next week may be extra dollars in the bank account. It is the expectation that God is going to bless us that should get us out of the bed each morning. Included in this expectation is the possibility that Mr. or Miss Right will come into our lives. Why wouldn’t you want to live a life of blessed expectation?

“To Thou [thine] Ownself Be True!” Let’s be true to God first and that will lead us to being what He wants us to be. It’s about God, not me.

“It sounds like the majority of your audience is female? We all know we think a little different than "you males" do(smile)...” When I speak of different perspectives, the least of those differences is because of our gender. Because of my family background, my childhood, my particular hopes and fears, my educational background, my personality traits and so on, the way I look at the world may be quite different than yours. Speaking of gender (male/female), it is my belief that God made men and women to be complementary to each other; not adversaries or as polar opposites.

“The writer is asking you to tell him your secrets and short comings yet He refuses to let us truly know his." When you say “writer”, are you referring to me? If so, then I would prefer you not tell me your secrets. It is none of my business. I am not clear on what you are referring to when you say that I am asking you to tell your secrets and shortcomings. Confess what you feel you must to God, not me. What is with this focus on me? Focus on God! Let’s stay focused on using this blog as a tool for our spiritual growth.

Why should we share on the blog when it is not a dependable source and it seems as though we are simply pass time or an experiment. As much as the readers try to make a connection , it is often broken because it feels as though “man thinks so highly of themselves” …and this is call “PRIDE” and as for me I am looking for a humble and caring friend and this is how I came to Christ..” I am not sure what you mean when you “the blog is not a dependable source and it seems as though we are simply pass time or an experiment”. But what I encourage all the readers to do is to share their thoughts and opinions (not secrets or shortcomings) so that we all can grow spiritually. It does me no good to know your secrets or shortcomings. It does do me good to know your thoughts and opinions because I might learn something. Also, I strongly encourage the readers to stay on track to spiritual growth. The main connection you want to make is with God. Let’s worry about connecting with other people after we have grown sufficiently that we all have God in our eyes.

“Amen, my brotha! If ONLY more men would look for "God In Her Eyes", more women would be drawn to the God in his eyes which would create a Godly couple.” For the most part, I agree with your statement. The only change I would suggest is that we not “look” for people with God in their eyes. Rather, we “BE” a person with God in our eyes. (Excuse the incorrect grammar!) In other words, the objective should not be to find a partner, but to re-establish the partnership with God.

“I think it was you who told me you love that person according to what you know that person can be or God intends for them to be not as they are at the moment.” Earlier in your comments you mentioned that the man should be willing to make an investment and they should be willing to meet the women where they are. I think what will work better for me is that I become as much of a person with God in my eyes as I can. That way, I will be in a better position to recognize a woman with God in her eyes. I want to be the best Kevin I can be. I will let God worry about investing in “Shenequa” and if He wants me to “meet her where she is”, then I pray for a discerning spirit to recognize God’s will.

“Thank you so very much for opening up your heart and sharing...” Is this the same person who said I was not sharing my “secrets” and that I was “pushing people away”? [smile].

“It is something to have it going on in one area, but not truly knowing what your purpose is in life.” I think that most of us get sidetracked because we don’t really understand God’s purpose for us. Without that knowledge, we find ourselves doing all kinds of crazy stuff and getting involved with people we have not business being with.

“The expectations of A Man with God in His Eyes (MWGIHE) are somewhat weak to me. Is it at all possible you are not able to see those true qualities because you are too close to the subject? Or perhaps, I have missed this one because I am not close enough to the subject.” By weak, are you saying that there should be more traits or are you saying my explanations were not clear? At any rate, I don’t feel like I am too close to see what the true qualities are. This particular topic is one that I have pondered for a long time and I feel pretty comfortable with my thoughts on this matter.

“Priesthood...is a quality that all God's people should have not only "men" (I know how you feel about quoting scriptures but this one is needed)...see 1 Peter 2:9 “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” My problem with people quoting scripture is they often do not provide an interpretation of what is being said. That is exactly what you have done; NOT providing any interpretation. Who is Peter referring to? Was it the Jews, the children of Israel, the priests of the day, the people who belonged to the new religion called Christianity? What is the key point of this scripture; the notion of priesthood, the idea of being a holy nation or the act of praising God? And what does this scripture have to do with your argument that the notion of priesthood is something meant for both the man and woman and not just for the man?

I think you and I may be closer in agreement than you think. My statement about the “prieshoodness” of men was in the context of his relationship with his female romantic partner. Her gift is influence. The two gifts are complementary. Many men will try to claim “authority” in a romantic relationship and many women let them get away with that. But what most men can legitimately claim (from a spiritual standpoint) is the authority to lead himself and his female romantic partner to the path of spiritual growth. Again, my comment about “priesthoodness” refers specifically to a husband and wife or a boyfriend and girlfriend.

“In other words, man has to see the purpose for a woman through the eyes of God ; the purpose of woman is not for man to abuse and use...the purpose of women out numbering men is not for him to be the grand lover or “playa” ...the purpose of that sassy woman is not for you to lay hands on...the purpose of that woman wearing tight clothes or revealing clothes is not for man to rape with his eyes or force his body upon her...the purpose of your power and influence is not to be little [belittle] and degrade that woman. Unless you have the purpose of God in those beautiful eyes of yours, you will miss the gift of woman God has given you.” Your meaning in this paragraph is not clear to me. How did you go from my discussion of the purpose for a man with God in his eyes to him becoming a “playa”, “an abuser”, “a rapist” and a “belittler”? In my opinion God made men and women to be different, but in a complementary sense. Thus, his weaknesses are negated by her strengths and vice versa. What you are describing is more of an adversarial context or something that is based on conflict. A sense of winning at the expense of the other losing. Why is that your focus? Lastly, I am of the strong opinion that the way a man looks at his purpose (as given to him by God) is different from the way a woman looks at her purpose (as given to her by God). Your arguments seems to ignore the complementary nature of male and females and assumes that men and women are same.